from the injections menu
And then, we had a smile all weekend
Robert, here is my first try at injection thearpy ...
Since I am not completely dry, I withheld fluids during breakfast and
lunch. Other than the milk on my cereal and the moisture in my vegetable
plate at lunch, I had nothing to drink. I figured there was
no need to add to the discomfort of showing the Full Monte to a strange
woman in a sterile medical office.
I went in with two pictures in my head of what could go wrong. In one, I
would be told to lie on a table, covered from neck to knees with a sheet
having a slit in the middle through which I protruded, limply at first
and engorged after an injection. Every once in a while, my fear went,
Helena would turn to me as I strained to see what was happening and say
in a stern voice, "Relax, honey."
Or, my wife and I would go in a room, sit in some plastic chairs in front
of a TV set and watch an hour VCR tape on options for treatment of ED.
I figured there would be nothing I could do if the first was the
scenario, but I could change the second: take charge of the
conversation. As I walked down the hall, I started.
"I have prepared a sheet of talking points," and we went from there. My
first point was the failure of Viagra to get an adequate erection. My
second was that we wanted to begin injection therapy as soon as
possible. I told a little of my history, what I thought might be
information pertinent to the job at hand, and what I understood side
effects might be. Then, I asked what was the agenda for today.
Nurse Helena explained how the injection worked illustrating with a plastic
penis and a needle. The conversation became lighter as I begged her to
assure my wife that this plastic model was exaggerated in size for
teaching purposes, that she had not been short changed all these
years. We had a laugh and things seemed better.
I was shown how to give the injection to the plastic penis and told to
pull my pants and shorts down to my knees, given a paper sheet to wrap
around my self, and told that she would be back. I felt more comfortable
with my pants and shorts completely off. It looked stupid to be standing
there with pants braced at knee level, so when she came back, I had
pants off and the paper towel around my waist like a bath towel.
I had been warned. The needle is stuck in and a little of the medication
is injected. If it burns, it may be positioned too high. Back out and
inject lower. So, she stuck me and asked, "Does that hurt?"
Hell, lady, you've got a needle stuck up to the hilt in my dick and you
want to know if it hurts?!
"No, it's okay."
And she pushed the plunger
down, set the clock, told me to mash the injection point for five
minutes, and left the room.
So, I stood there. It was kind of silly. me and my wife watching as my
penis gradually engorged. Finally, the alarm sounded signaling that five
minutes had elapsed, and in five more, Helena knocked and came in. I stood
there nearly naked with a pretty good erection. She pulled the paper
sheet up to cover me and felt how firm it was like I would feel a banana
to see if it was too ripe. Out she goes again.
I noted that the firmness was better than I got with Viagra except in
the seconds before orgasm. The important test was to lie down. So I lay
down on the examining table in the room and lost it. Lost the damn
She came back in and agreed that this is what happened and said a
sentence that contained the two words venous leak. She told me to
stand up again and she was going to get the urologist who did
my surgery. While standing, I got a good engorgement again.
My urologist came in, we exchanged pleasantries, and then I presented him
with the problem. I reminded him that some couples in movies have
intercourse standing up. He laughed and said that what we needed was a
stool for my wife. Tension relieving, right? Then, he said venous leakage
two or three times and talked about a tourniquet that he thought could
be found in Adult Stores. "Really?" I asked. That would have all the
disadvantages of the vacuum pump which I was avoiding.
Did I hurt? Yes. There was the ache that I had been warned about. But,
look. I can tolerate that. "Take an Advil before injecting." That didn't
sound so good to me. I'd rather have just a little pain with a good,
firm erection. He bid farewell and said to make another appointment.
"You want me to lie down again to see if it stays firm?" I asked
Helena. The answer was no; I should put my clothes on. And she bounced
out. You know, it has been a long time since I put my clothes on with a
pretty good erection. Now, let's see. Which is the best way to position
this thing? If it points down, it hurts. Point upwards and watch what
happens when I walk out into the lobby.
A little later, Helena walked back in and repeated for me to make
another appointment. "Tomorrow?" Helena laughed. Remember, she said, you have to
wait two days between injections. So next Thursday, I go again. Today
she used 5 units (whatever they were) and next time she will triple the
dosage. Hmm! That may be interesting.
'S funny. She said if that works, I try it at home the third time and
then call her to tell her what happened. I laughed. "What do you want?
'Ohhh, this is sooo good?'" She laughed. "Call the next working day. Not
at ten o'clock at night!"
And, that's the way we left it.
Venous leakage scares me. If 15 units don't work, we try TRIMIX. I don't
know what happens if that doesn't work. So, you see. There was no WOW
today. It was more an Ah ha day.
(who is being introduced to kinky sex by his urologist)
[A week later, Jim sent this update.]
I had waited all week for a return visit with Helena. Last week, venous
leakage spoiled the attempt. We were going to try 15 micrograms this
week - three times as much as before.
I wanted to increase the possibility of a good visit in one more way: I
wanted to do the injection. I asked; she agreed. We started off with a
general discussion of the agenda for today and the near future.
"Ok, let's do it." Helena went out to get the needle and I shucked my
pants completely, remembering last week's experience. I wanted to be
able to see the territory, so I also unbuttoned my shirt and wrapped
myself below the waist in the paper sheet.
It is really silly to wear this sheet, for when she came in and put the
needle on her desk, together with an alcohol pad, there was nothing for
me to do except to put the sheet aside and get to it. I told her that I
had rehearsed in my head how this was going to work. My picture had been
that I would talk through it, saying exactly the words she used last
"Push all loose skin toward the base. Hold the head in the crook between
the thumb and the forefinger with the thumb on the dorsal side and the
forefinger on the ventral side. Feel the soft tissue between these two
fingers at about the three o'clock position. Choose a spot and clean it
with the sterile pad. Position the needle perpendicular to the target
and push. Push harder! See, that doesn't hurt. Inject a little to see if
it burns. No, it's okay. Empty the syringe and remove it. Mash the spot
for five minutes."
I looked up at my wife and beamed. My wife was smiling as Helena left
with a promise to come back. I paced, looked in the floor length mirror,
and paced. In about eight minutes, Helena came in, looked to see the
status, watched me lie down on the examining table and watched me loose
it. She shook her head and said she will come back with my urologist.
Well, if venous leakage were the key words last week, the key words
this week were engorgement and rigidity. The urologist said it was
clear that I had good engorgement but that the leakage was preventing
Talking with the urologists, I made the connection of venous leakage and
my big veins. I knew that people who lift and who have run at the level
I have often have big blood vessels. Since I was thirty something, I
have had the beginnings of varicose veins in my legs. The urologist
agreed that the varicose veins are connected to this venous leakage, but
assured me that they do not foretell a future health threat. He proved
that a ring would help me by mashing with two fingers close to the base,
improving rigidity. In talking about rings, Theresa recommended a
product called actis and suggested that I begin investigation for how to
get them. She even provided an 800 number. She also suggested that I
wait on buying these for a while. She thinks she can get me medicated at
such a level that I'll not need the ring.
Here is the status. I came home with a needle containing double today's
dosage. So, I've gone from 5 to 15 to 30 micrograms. I'm to try it this
weekend and give her a call Monday. If it works, she'll phone in a
prescription for me. If it does not, in the next visit, we switch to
what she calls the cocktail: TRIMIX. We'll push that up for a while, and
then I may have to go to the injection plus a ring.
TRIMIX has a drug as part of the cocktail that is metabolized in the
liver. That is why the urology group I use stays away from that
medication if they can. I asked where the current drug is metabolized.
Helena did not know. I think it is in the lungs. I'll look in the web a
little about that.
In my report last week, I tried to convey a part of the lighthearted
atmosphere that was achieved in this experimentation. It was there
today, too. For example, when I asked why they did not just stock the
rings and sell them, the urologist laughed that they had thought of
having a high class Adult Store out the back to improve the profit. That
was the way it went. I think we were all disappointed that we did not
have the best possible outcome today but, as I said at the beginning, we
accomplished at least one big victory: self injection.
I have high hopes for the weekend. I'll stick that big dart in all the
way and hope to stand tall. I am lucky to have people that I enjoy to
work with on this problem of ED.
[After the weekend, Jim sent this report.]
Thirty milograms did it. It got me up, and it was glorious. But,
then, I stayed up. I had to take Sudafed to go down, so Helena is
sending in a prescription for a smaller dosage. There may be some fine
tune adjustments. But, it is going to work.
I was proud. And, my wife had a smile all weekend.