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A selection from
cover of book

photo of Keith and Virginia Laken
with permission of
Ant Hill Press
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Looking Back
Finally, We Can Laugh

[continued from previous page]

wonderful to laugh with others who really understand the bizarre and embarrassing nature of this problem!

Today, I'm not only able to do this, I want to do more of it.


Humor and impotence/win Keith's perspective . . .

Before the surgery, I used to be right there with all the other guys, cracking jokes about men who couldn't get it up, and making fun of short penises. In fact, I was probably the initiator of the jokes much of the time.

But not today.

Since my surgery, I don't crack impotence jokes or make fun of infirmities in public. I just can't. I'm too sensitized to the situation, and wouldn't want to hurt anybody who's trying to get his life back again.

But I do make jokes privately with Gin, all the time, about our own situation.

Why?

She and I have a unique sense of humor about this. We can now get a good laugh out of what could easily be seen by others as bizarre or tragic.

Some might call it "gallows humor," but I see it more as humor that's meant to relieve tension or to communicate feelings. Joking with Gin about my impotence helps me get things off my chest.

And I love double entendres, like "the captain shouldn't go down before the ship" or "I can't keep a stiff upper lip."

Humor is strange that way. It's perfectly acceptable for me to make fun of myself, but no one wants to be the subject of jokes.

Like the old adage says: It's okay to laugh with me, but don't laugh at me.

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